Ups & Downs
*Originally posted on www.facebook.com/adriannesoundslike
Real Talk. Some days you feel fired up about your music, like there's nothing you can't do... other days, you feel weighed down by all of the things you aren't or haven't reached yet---
Often I have wondered what it would feel like to have a career with a clear-cut path. Or what it would be like to be a mother who settles in and makes being a mom a full-time job and finds satisfaction in that. I have asked God to redirect me if it's all just a silly waste of time, and I have given up completely at times.
It's not so much that I'm seeking approval, it's that I have so much ambition inside, and it's frustrating to feel like I'm so far from reaching my goals. It's also financially tiring, as the cost of producing, recording, mixing, mastering a *SINGLE* is $1,000+, and the financial return now is almost nothing, because most people stream now, and streaming pays fractions of cents per listen.
Besides God though, I have never felt about anything the way I feel about music and singing--- it's my biggest blessing. But in the times when everything tells me I have the wrong look, the wrong sound, am the wrong age, too much this, not enough that, it can feel like it's my heaviest burden.
I don't know what else to do but to keep going though, working hard, and trusting, and hoping for the best.
Do you know what I mean?